Staying Together for the Kids


Many unhappy couples choose to remain married and delay divorce because they are “staying together for the kids.” They believe it best for their children to be raised in an intact family rather than being a child of divorce. While it may be true that children thrive in complete, happy families, staying together for the kids may cause more harm than good.

Unhappily married couples typically live with a fair amount of conflict, unrest, and tension. They argue, they mock one another, they compete for the affection of their children. Often, these parents are, understandably, so preoccupied with the conflict in the marriage and their own unhappiness that it is impossible for them to be the best parent they can be when it comes to their children.

Children are a product of the environment in which they are raised; if that environment is riddled with tension, arguments, and an undercurrent of animosity, it will have an effect on how they grow up and the decisions and choices they make as an adult.

Conversely, if a child is raised in two separate households, while this will certainly be disruptive and perhaps not the ideal situation for a child, it will serve the child better to grow up with the love and support of two parents who are not living under the weight of a crumbling marriage.

Children are resilient, adaptable, and far more aware than adults give them credit for. The impact of a divorce on a child will only be as negative as his or her parents allow it to be. If a mother and father discuss the divorce and separation in a direct way without animosity and work together to co-parent and raise their children, it is more beneficial than remaining together for the sake of the children at the cost of raising children without two fully present parents.


To schedule an appointment with one of our attorneys or for further information, call us at the Law Office of Gregory P. LaMonaca, P.C., at (610) 892-3877

About the author

About Alicia Fastman

Alicia Fastman graduated from Hofstra University with a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology, then went on to complete her Juris Doctorate at the Widener University School of Law in Wilmington, DE. Alicia graduated from law school with pro bono distinction, completed a Certificate in Criminal Law, and focused her intensive studies within the fields of litigation and trial advocacy. Alicia joined LaMonaca Law in April of 2011 and is a Partner at the firm. She was selected as a Top Lawyer in Main Line Magazine in 2014, 2016, 2017, and 2019 in the areas of Family Law and Divorce and has been named as a Best Lawyer in the areas of Adoption and Trial in the Delaware County Daily Times. Alicia is licensed to practice law in Pennsylvania, and is a member of the Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, and Delaware County Bar Associations. Alicia resides in Delaware County with her dog, Leonard. In her time outside of the courtroom or office, she enjoys creating art, listening to podcasts, and spending time with friends and family.